How is self-confidence created?

I would say, easy to identify, yet probably difficult to define, conceptualise, or even measure what self-confidence means? I believe one of the main requirements to success, happiness and reaching your goals is confidence. Having a tremendous amount of self-confidence, will definitely be a useful attribute in just about every aspect of your life. Lets face it, you were probably not born oozing with self-confidence, that is, self-confidence is not something innate, yes it can be taught, nurtured and even built over the years, at any stage in life. Confidence is not to be personally owned by anyone; the person who has it, learns it and continues to build upon it. Ultimately, your degree of confidence is truly the outcome of how you perceive yourself - which is eventually how people will perceive you too. How people relate and respond to you is certainly a reflection of how you perceive yourself. Therefore, if you don't currently have a high degree of self-confidence or a lack self-esteem then it could likely be because you may be concentrating on your not so positive traits or on what you are not doing right. I was certainly guilty of this crime. I was potentially my own worst enemy! The good thing is though, I discovered that I could alter this behavior and took the necessary steps to improve my self-confidence. The fact of the matter is, even the most talented person on earth at some stage, probably had to build confidence in their talents from a foundation that consisted of faith and knowledge, just like anybody else. Naturally, this of course differs from one person to the other, but the necessary job is similar. Confidence and attitude are accessible to all of us according to our skills and requirements and not somebody else's, as long as we make use of our God given talents. Being self-confident is ultimately an approach which allows us to have a positive yet reasonable viewpoint of ourselves and our conditions. However, i'd like to point out that having self-confidence does not necessarily mean that you will be able to do everything. During a period of my life where I was certainly not as self-confident as I am today, I relied on the constant approval of other people in order to feel good about myself. It certainly prevented me from taking risks because I was so afraid to fail. It was almost as if I did not expect to succeed before I had even begun.

Very rarely did I acknowledge any comments or praise that were paid to me, and would often put myself down. Whereas by stark contrast, the self-confident woman I am today is much more willing to risk the disapproval of others because I now truly believe in my own skills and abilities. I have finally accepted myself; flaws and all, just imperfectly perfect and no longer feel I have to conform in order to be accepted. In summary, self-confidence is not necessarily a general trait or characteristic which permeates all aspects of a persons life. It is quite common that individuals will have some aspects of their lives where they think they are quite confident, for instance, academics and sports, while at the same time they may not feel as confident in other areas, for example, their personal appearance, social relationships, among others.

Self confidence is definitely not the key to everything. However, it might be the key to something, but what I have learnt without a shadow of a doubt, is that loving yourself is the key to everything. If you love and believe in yourself this will go hand in hand with self confidence.

Do you know when destiny calls?

Over the last few years it has become so clear to me that whatever it is that I am currently experiencing, is just as it should be at that precise moment.

When our soul awakens to its divine purpose, it simply means that the time has finally arrived for us to live a completely fulfilled existence. And just like that the door of divine timing opens, and then we are presented with opportunities to carry out our individual missions. Now under no uncertain terms our soul will ensure we are exactly where we are supposed to be in order to accomplish our mission. I am certain of this as the needs of the soul (destiny) definitely outweigh that of the conscious mind.

In my experience divine timing does not even necessarily have to be something major, it could simply be something like you saying the right thing at the right time to inspire somebody, and by doing so it will have an impact on changing not only their vibrations, but on a collective scale too.

Personally, I can testify that living in harmony with divine timing is nothing short of amazing! even if it requires taking a road that is often less travelled, as it is always from a place of our highest and best, even when it doesn't always make sense. Trust me there are absolutely no rules to this.

What is for sure is that you will receive guidance at this time, your soul will create this divine timing, why? because it knows what you are truly on this earth to do. Believe it or not you are on this earth because you wanted to be. trust me I know it probably may not ever feel that way, but on a soul level, you came here solely to make a difference. Now you are blessed enough to be able to learn how to do it.

Divine timing is something that is unique to you, you may be fortunate enough to be in a position where others bare witness to it. However, only you will see it in its entirety. God will show you only when you are fully ready to see it. For myself, I was certainly afraid for a while to embrace my divine timing but now with hindsight, I understand that there was a reason for it. Clearly, I was supposed to experience more, more than I had ever imagined. It was necessary for me to alter my fears of what was to be.

Understand the path to divine timing is almost always never without difficulty, but this is the time to lean to your creator to seek guidance, this along with the faith to know it will be well and it will be as it is supposed to be.

The arrival to your own divine timing destination can sometimes depend on whether we make the right choices that we are presented with. But you will be amazed at what you can accomplish, quite possibly it will be more than you can ever have imagined in your wildest dreams.

Just remember this is something we want to do on a soul level, and not something we have to do because others have instructed us to.

With blessings

Marcia Mcleod

How to be strong and surrender

Surrender =

Complete acceptance of what is

+

Faith that all is well, even without my input.

In my experience, things seem to go a lot smoother when I give up control - when I allow them to happen instead of making them happen. Unfortunately, I used to be quite bad at this. Although I’m much better than I used to be, I still have my moments where I am known for being bit of a control freak. I have been known to use perfectly good energy trying to plan, predict, and prevent things that I cannot possibly plan, predict, or prevent.

For example, I have often wondered if my children are going to be ok in this current world crisis, since we are all scattered in various corners of the globe. If not, just how awful that might actually be, with me being so far away from them. I then begin to think through their daily life routines especially with the online learning that has started, and here I am attempting to figure out exactly what they are up against as if their destiny is something I can even control.

As a recovering control freak, there are some things I do know for sure about trying to control things:

Control is also a result of being attached to a specific outcome - an outcome we’re sure is most favourable, as if we always know what’s best! We try to control things because of what we think will happen if we don’t. In other words, control is rooted in fear.

When we trust that we’re okay no matter what circumstances come our way, we don’t need to micromanage the universe. We can let go. And we open ourselves up to all sorts of wonderful possibilities that aren’t there when we’re attached to one “right” path.

The energy of surrender accomplishes much more than the energy of control.

I suspect it’s slightly different for everyone, but here’s what control mode looks and feels like for me:

My vision gets very narrow and focused, adrenaline is pumping fiercely and my heart rate increases quite significantly.

My mind shifts from topic to topic and from past to future very quickly, and I have little to no concentration, and virtually no present-moment awareness.

Sound familiar?

When I become aware that I’m in control mode, I imagine that I’m in the sea swimming against the current. It’s very difficult. It’s a fight. That’s what control feels like to me.

When I choose to let go and surrender, I visualise myself turning around, letting go of the fight and just being still, floating in the sea.

I’m being gently pulled, with no effort necessary on my part. Simply breathing and saying to myself, “let go of the fear” is usually enough to get me there.

In surrender mode, I’m calm, peaceful. Breathing deeply, present in the moment. I see clearly and my vision extends out around me, allowing me to (literally) see the bigger picture.

So the great irony is that attempting to control things actually feels like I am less in control. When I’m micromanaging and obsessing over unnecessary details, I eventually come to know that I’m standing in my own way.

Surrender literally means to stop fighting. Stop fighting with yourself. Stop fighting the universe and the natural flow of things. Stop resisting and pushing against reality.

Now don’t get me wrong, It’s not about inaction. It’s about taking action from that place of surrender energy.

If letting go of control and surrendering not only feel better, but actually produce better results, then how can we ensure we are doing that? Sometimes it’s as easy as noticing that you’re in control mode and choosing to let go - consciously and deliberately shifting into surrender energy.

Naturally, there are times that it’s a lot harder to make the shift from control to surrender. Here are a few questions you can ask yourself that may be able to help:

What am I afraid will happen if I let go of control?

When you pinpoint the fear, question its validity. Ask yourself, is it true?  For example, you have become afraid that the entire evening you have planned will be totally ruined if your friend doesn’t remember to bring the bottle of wine (and you’ve already reminded her ten times), you really do need to question that assumption.

Is it really possible for you to know that the evening would be entirely ruined without the wine? And frankly even if it was going to be ruined (by your definition, anyway), in the grand scheme of things what’s so bad about that?

Find out whose business you’re in, is it yours?

Your business is purely the realm of things that you and only you can directly influence. Are you there? Or are you in someone else’s business? When we’re trying to control things outside of our own business, it’s for sure not going to go well.

Think about this: Could letting go actually feel like freedom?

I believe It almost always would. How about letting that feeling of freedom guide you toward loosening your grip.

By simply learning to control yourself, altering your thoughts and deleting any negativity will allow you to become more receptive to allowing things to happen. Of course this is certainly a skill that can be practiced and improved upon. It helps to believe that the Universe has your back and is supporting you at every turn so that you don’t have to worry yourself over minor unnecessary details.

Of course we can always choose to do things either the easy way or the hard way. We can power through and struggle, or we can let go be still and let the current carry us.

There is such a peaceful, yet focused energy that accompanies holding the intention of knowing exactly what I want, but not actually forcing myself to do it. That energy is totally magic. Yes, I’m still a work in progress, but I’m allowing it to become more of a habit instead of making it a habit.

At this moment, I have let go of the need to control anything that is happening or even trying to force things to work. I believe that this situation serves as a reminder to practice surrendering to be able to find peace, calm and groundedness in your current situation.

You might want to ask yourself. Am I willing to take a break from building, creating and achieving? And, how can I promote peace around me and within me?

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

.